Our world just got bigger and better. It’s with a happy heart that I think about the new baby coming into our lives. But I also worry that this sudden turn of events will change the dynamic of our family relationships – and my goal as the mom is to keep our lives stable. I’m a single mom and now my daughter is going to be a single mom. Her brother and sister are invested in the process, but are still figuring out their role in this new family dynamic.
Making Together Better
Together is Better with a Nap, no? – circa 1993 – and I’m still tired today….
Making Together Better – it’s my new mantra in life. We have to take a situation that, while not planned or thought out… IS. It just IS. And making sure that we remain a solid family unit is a challenge when you have such a big shift in priorities. I mean it’s a baby, right? It’s hard not to go crazy over the little one! We were once just a mom, a brother and two sisters, but now the roles shift to Grandma, Mom, Uncle and Aunt. I particularly worry because each child has their own challenges moving into adulthood, and so my mother role has never stopped.
Blessed and challenged at the same time.
How will we make together better? It was pretty good to begin with. And now this new baby will bring so much joy to each of our lives, but at the same time how do I as the Mom make sure that no one person is lost in the transition? I have a few thoughts, but would love to hear yours too.
- 1. Make time for each child individually so they know I still value that parent child relationship – even though the children may be older.
- 2. Give uncle and aunt the freedom to decide their own role in the baby’s life.
- 3. Don’t make assumptions about their feelings based on my own and acknowledge those feelings when necessary.
Think this can work? I hope so. I want our time together to be filled with joy and not feelings of frustration. It’s hard not to make it all about baby since, well, it’s a baby. But I need to remember I have 3 kids of my own. Grown now, but they’ll always be my babies.
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